I been here for years
Rockin my peers and puttin suckas in fear
Makin the tears rain down like a MON-soon
Over the competition, I’m towerin
Wreckin shop, when I drop these lyrics that’ll make you call the cops
Don’t you dare stare, you betta move
Don’t ever compare
Me to the rest that’ll all get sliced and diced
Competition’s payin the price
I’m gonna knock you out (HUUUH!!!)
Mama said knock you out (HUUUH!!!)
— LL Cool J
I’m back, baby.
You can’t keep a good man down.
Unfortunately, Mrs. FryDay Night felt my wrath last week as Santa Margarita defeated Servite, 21-0, to return me to OCVarsity Pickapalooza Deathmatch glory. My Eagles came through for me and I claimed Mrs. FryDay Night’s Royal Bear as my trophy.
There was a disturbance in the OCVarsity Force for four weeks. It was a disturbance I hadn’t sensed since … ever in the history of OCVarsity Pickapalooza Deathmatches, and that is a storied and well chronicled history.
I’m done basking in my OCVarsity Pickapalooza Deathmatch glory. The reigning and defending OCVarsity Pickapalooza Deathmatch champion needs a new challenger. OCVarsity feature-writing machine Adam Maya has decided to step into the arena.
Maya is a good kid with a lot of heart. Actually, he is a great kid with a ton of heart. When he isn’t churning out beautifully-written pieces about key figures in the O.C. football scene, he attends church multiple times per week and works with various charities. Maya is actually heading out to Haiti on Friday to spend a week working at an orphanage. Seriously. I can’t compete with that, but fortunately for me Maya’s good deeds won’t help him in the OCVarsity Pickapalooza Deathmatch arena.
“You need people like me so you can point your fingers and say, ‘That’s the bad guy.’ So… what that make you? Good? You’re not good. You just know how to hide, how to lie. Me, I don’t have that problem. Me, I always tell the truth. Even when I lie. So say good night to the bad guy! Come on. The last time you gonna see a bad guy like this again, let me tell you. Come on. Make way for the bad guy. There’s a bad guy comin’ through! Better get outta his way”
OK, I had to get that out of my system.
This week’s OCVarsity Pickapalooza Deathmatch game is Mater Dei vs. Santa Margarita in a huge Trinity League matchup on Friday at 7:30 p.m. at Saddleback College. The game will be televised live by Fox Sports West.
Santa Margarita is ranked No. 1 in the county, No. 1 in the Pac-5 Division, No. 2 in the state by Cal-HiSports and No. 1 in the nation by ESPN. The Eagles are 6-0 overall and 1-0 in league. Mater Dei is ranked No. 3 in the county, No. 5 in the Pac-5 and No. 13 in the state. The Monarchs are 5-1 overall and 1-0 in league. Mater Dei’s lone loss was an 18-17 defeat to Narbonne of Harbor City, which is ranked No. 4 in the state and No. 18 in the nation.
The Eagles lost star QB Johnny Stanton to a season-ending knee injury and last week and Josh Canty and sophomore Kyle Sweet were charged with replacing Stanton. Both struggled in the victory over Servite. Canty was 5 of 8 passing for 30 yards and two interceptions. Sweet replaced him in the second half and was 6 of 7 for 36 yards and he ran for 52 yards. The Eagles will have to rely heavily on star running back Ryan Wolpin, their huge offensive line and a swarming defense, led by hard-hitting safety Connor O’Brien, to get past the Monarchs.
Mater Dei playmaker Thomas Duarte caught two touchdown passes and returned an interception for another TD in Mater Dei’s 42-10 victory over JSerra. The Monarchs will need another big effort from Duarte to take down the Eagles. Linebacker JC Genova is another key player to keep an eye on from Mater Dei’s defensive unit.
I’m sticking with my Eagles and I’m putting my South Park Kenny bobblehead on the line. Maya is takes the Monarchs and he’s putting up his Ken Griffey Jr. Beanie Baby Bear.
Get ready for another epic confrontation.
If you want to get in on a future OCVarsity Pickapalooza Deathmatch, hit me up on Twitter @LosOCVarsity or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with the team you want to represent and what you are willing to sacrifice for OCVarsity Pickapalooza Deathmatch glory.